Being Trayvon Martins

You are born black, you are forced to live all your life in fear, and at the same time must resist this fear. Having to fight off or prove wrong, stereotypes about you, yet at the same time endangering your own life. I suppose, even had Trayvon not ‘fought back’, fact is, Zimmerman was gon’ still victimize him, I mean by merely calling him a ‘fucking punk’ and ‘asshole’ without knowing or talking …to him, proved that he had already intended to ‘get rid’ of him, because “they” always ‘get away’. Trayvon knew that even if he had fled, his life would still be in danger, I mean it mattered not what he did, he was black and already judged by a white man(yes Zimmerman isn’t a latino surname or word), he had to be taken care off, (that’s why Zimmerman ignored the advise from the 911 Police dispatcher to not pursue nor approach Trayvon). I can imagine, in Tray’s mind, if he had to die, at least it would have to be fighting back not just surrender willingly to an aggressor he never even provoked, except by being black, wearing a hoodie and walking in a white neighborhood. I know as a young black man, in a world that constantly makes me feel weak and powerless, fighting back, even if I am gon’ lose, remains the only honorable choice one has. Trayvon was and is a victim, he was provoked, and he had every right to react, whichever way he saw fit, Zimmerman had no right to instill fear in his young life and getaway with it, Trayvon had to stand his ground as well, even though he ended up dead, he did what he had to, and Zimmerman did what he didn’t even had to. Tray’s personal disciplinary track record and his personal demons were not and can never be reason enough as to why Zimmerman approached, provoked and fatally shot him that evening. Whatever his personal flaws, Trayvon was a victim that fateful day and even though Zimmerman unfairly and unjustifiably took his life that night, the US Justice System had no right equally to deny him his dignity and justice since that night. I have fought back tears each and every time I read through anything about Trayvon’s murder, and as a blackman, I know just how tough and hellish it is out there, to be judged and denied a right to not only existence but also have a choice on how you live. Its just plain wrong to existence in this world while black and anything you do to disprove this, almost always ends with devastating consequences, we saw with Emmet Till, George Stinney, Sean Bell, Rodney King etc…whatever action or inaction, once identified as a victim amongst other potential victims, you are sure as hell, to die, similar to the way The Creeper in the movie Jeepers Creepers identifies and pursues its victims. You are and were not at fault Trayvon, the world and Zimmerman are the guilty ones, for refusing to acknowledge you as a human being too and killing you for trying to disprove them. I sincerely hope wherever you are, have no regrets whatsoever with being who you were and are. The only regret is the man who chose to play God with your life is walking free, with the possibility and potential to murder many more young black men. We will never know how your life would eventually turn out, Zimmerman made sure of that and your family and friends are left with so many could have and would have beens, with bittersweet memories. You may have not been part of any progressive and political black movements, but your existence alone was a threat to the racist white order, as a potential activist and agitator against it, hence you were killed. Rest in Power my brother and your death vividly reminds us of what we are up against here, whether in the US or SA or anywhere in the world.
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